I realize sometimes you have to push yourself through your own affliction and just take it. I’ve been observing many things lately. I’ve realized some of my problems are my fault, not a disease’s. I am working on myself because of I, myself, am my own sickness. I am the only one who can fix myself. I will no longer blame people for the responsibility for my own actions and feelings. I will no longer rely on others to keep me up or make me feel needed here. I will no longer keep my feelings hidden for the sake of other’s feelings. I have decided that I need to stop being so nice and become a little selfish if I want to become the person I want to be. I don’t want to spend my life giving others what I deserve anymore, and I won’t do it anymore. I will make myself happy before anyone else from now on. Life is to short to do for others that don’t deserve to be done for.
Undefined
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I enjoyed reading this piece. You touched on a number of deep issues in this, and I think many people will be able to relate to your ideas. I think it is a common thing for people to realize that they need to start being a bit more selfish, and start focusing on themselves.
I agree with KendallMcCormick that you touched on some deep issues. People do need to take care of themselves. You need a break to rejuvenate yourself if you want to keep pressing forward. I think a lot of our human fears of rejection comes from “If I say ‘no’…” If you say ‘no’ then what happens? Will the sun blow up and eliminate our solar system? Doubtful. If that happens at the moment you say ‘no’ then there’s no one left to be disappointed anyway, is there. If you say ‘no,’ the worst someone (who is reasonable or a true friend) will say is “It’s ok, I’m disappointed but I understand” or some variation on that.
We have to stop saying ‘yes’ to every damn thing. That includes allowing other people’s negativity to influence us or bring us down. I have a friend who was a really angry fellow. Some chemical issues in his head, but also a lot of resentment toward family. He was really funny to be around, but he also had a super-manipulative dark side. It would have been easy to stay friends with him because he could be very charming, but the darkness was almost palpable around him sometimes. And then he told my sister (who he only knew through me) that it was people like her who made him want to kill himself. We had to kick him out of our circle of friends. It took all his friends cutting him off for him to realize that he needed to get help. And he finally did. He started seeing a counselor and got some medication to help with the brain chemical issues. So us being ‘selfish’ brought about something good for this guy.