Contrary to what one might believe, silence can be the most deafening sound in existence. Nothing makes your ears burst like standing in complete silence, stillness reverberating around you, bouncing back to hit you with a force that could knock the very breath from you. The absence of a sound you know should be there can echo in your mind, inescapable and torturous. Silence that demands to be heard.
That’s what surrounded me all the time. Even now as I stood on the edge of the roof, stalking the sun as it crept farther and farther down. Below me was the city that never sleeps; cars beeping, girls giggling as they walked hand in hand, door bells dinging as people came in and out, in and out. Constant movement, constant sound. But I didn’t hear a thing but the silence. I just stood there, watching for what must have been at least an hour now. My bones felt frigid and my jaw tight from being locked shut for so long. I hadn’t moved since I had planted myself here, knowing I wouldn’t leave until he showed. So I continued to watch the sun as it retreated into the distance, darkness consuming the sky and cars and buildings lighting it up like stars.
“Well don’t tell me you’re thinking of jumping.”
I felt my fists tighten in my pockets at the sound of his sneer voice, daring to make jokes as he strode over to me. I could hear him getting closer, but pride kept me from turning to face him.
“Sorry for the wait, it seems my services are in popular demand these days.”
He stopped next to me, taking a pack of cigarettes from his pocket, methodically removing one with one hand and pursing it between his lips while he lit it with the other-a motion that was swift and graceful after having been done a couple thousand times. After a long drag, he blew the smoke out, slow and smooth, and turned to me. I willed my bones to thaw and face him. I was expecting his face to bare his usual humorous expression, the kind that people wore as they waited for you to speak, simply so they could reply with some clever or sarcastic remark, dying to evoke the tiniest bit of laughter. But to my surprise, it was absent for the first time. Instead, he was looking at me with…concern? His brows were furrowed and he was still, allowing his cigarette to slowly burn away between his two fingers.
“What?” My voice was hoarse from going so long without speaking. It sliced through the air and made me cringe.
“I’m sorry, you know. I might be an ass, but I’m not heartless.”
“Thanks.” My reply dripping with bitter sarcasm. He couldn’t possibly understand. People like him never would, and for the first time in my life, I envied that. I wasn’t here for his condolences anyway, and I didn’t want to waste any more precious time on him than necessary.
“Sure. I got what you asked for, it was a bitch to find though. Took me nearly three days.” He took one last hit, squashing the smoking butt under his foot before removing an envelope from his pocket.
I reached for it, but he pulled back, looking at me with those same eyes, full of pity, searching me. And I realized.
“You don’t think I can do it.”
It wasn’t a question. I could see it all over his face. Perhaps a part of him was concerned for me, but that wasn’t what was really holding him back. He was scared of the part he would play in all this if I were to fail. This realization made heat rise in my cheeks and I felt anger flare through my body.
“You don’t know me. And you have no idea what I’m capable of.” I glared into his eyes.
His jaw locked hard and he held my eyes for a moment before reluctantly handing over the envelope. I snatched it from his hand and made my way towards the door. Just as I reached for the handle I heard his reply, so soft I couldn’t tell if he had intended for me to hear.
“Neither do you.”
I felt myself hesitate for a moment, considering demanding what that was supposed to mean, but thought better of it and lurched open the door handle. I made my way down the winding stairs, skipping steps and checking my watch, thinking I’d be at the airport in less than an hour, and on the plane by two.
WRITTEN BY: GRACE RILEY
Realistic Fiction
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This is truly amazing, and leaves me on the edge of my seat!