first thing
first sip
immediately a different person
is this a habit for fun . boredom
fear guilt weakness hopelessness
what could i have done differently
why do i continue to self destruct
mental illness substance abuse .
all excuses?
love understanding . i couldn’t love someone like me
the way he does
this will ruin things in the long run
or will it . says that devil on my shoulder
will the sickness kill ‘us’
content in that sick weak moment . mind
blinders on just following my emotions
no will power over that feeling . satisfaction
how will it end . only i decide
Poetry
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Wow! I can so relate. Thank you for writing and posting!!