April 26th, 2018 7:13 PM
Today, unlike any days of the past year, is a day that resolution and conviction have entered my world. I have made the decision to no longer pursue a friendship with her. A week has passed now, the days have been growing longer and longer as I agonize over this decision. She was the light in my world, her grace and beauty was unequaled by any of creations majesties and I have dissolved any opportunity of her continuing to be a part of my world.
Inside, my heart is overcome with feelings of regret, indecision, confusion, sorrow, most of all sorrow. How could I think that a life without her in it was a life worth living? How could I possible believe that this decision was the lesser of any foreseeable evil? How could I possibly act so selfishly, believing that I am the only one who will feel pain? My horizon now seems like a place where night, cold, darkness, and despair will reign eternally.
Somehow, I must believe that the absolution from the endless wondering of my minds creation will eventually free my soul. I must stand vigilant and remain strong knowing that freedom from the uncertainty of my minds desires will ultimately allow my feelings to be free. I must remember that my current feeling will only be a temporary part of my existence, but continuing upon the prior path would have left me wandering an eternal abyss.
Today, unlike any days of the past year, I hope to have optimism return to my life once again. I hope that one day I can return to being friends with her, without allowing myself to fall again. I hope that the world is not as cold and dark of a place as I imagine it again. I hope, but I do not believe.
Journalistic Writing
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The emotion here is really powerful and eloquently put! Well done!