Hey Ya’ll, my name is Clarke. I am 15,and a sophomore in high school. Earlier this year I was diagnosed with depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, multiple personality disorder. In the last month I have been hospitalized twice, the first time it was because of a suicide attempt. The second was because of suicide idealization. So I guess you can say im mentally fucked. Not all of my life sucks. I have an amazing boyfriend who will stand by me no matter what. I have two amazing friends and an awesome family. As you read on you will learn about me and my life and how I have pushed through all of my struggles. Our story will start when I was born and then skip ahead to the start of this last year. This story is one hundred percent true, it is my life and real experiences I have every day. I hope that as you read this you come to realize, that you are not alone in your struggles , you are loved and you are perfect the way you are no matter what flaws you have.
I was born on April 30th of 2004. Both of my parents were drug addicts and were not prepared to take care of a baby. They decided to try to take care of me. I was passed around from nabor to nabor and friend to friend. I never stayed in one place. I was abused in many was, sexually, physically, verbally, emotionally.It really damaged me. at the age of four the state took me away. I was released to the custody of my second cousin and her husband. They had to deal with a child that hated people and was terrified of everything. I had really bad anger issues. I guess you could say I was a child from hell. Of course it got easier as I got older. I went from not being able to go near my dad to not ever leaving his side.
THE LAST YEAR………..
The beginning of the year started off really normal I stared 9th grade year. I was getting good grades. I had friends. I was hiding my cuts and depression. I never ate, and when i did i would go to the bathroom and throw it up. So basically like it had always been. Little did i know this year would be different from all the rest. We will start from where it all change.
Its a rainy Monday morning. I make my way down the crowded hall towerd my looker, to get my books. As I walked into first period, I noticed a young man sitting at the table where me and my friends always sit. I thought, no big deal. By the end of the period we were getting really comfortable. His name was joey. I really liked him, and it turned out he liked me. Three weeks later he asked me out and I said yes. we dated on and off the whole rest of the year. Theres another boy in my life. He had been in my life for almost four years, and I had liked him since the day we meet. His name is Tomas. In June the most unexpected thing happened. HE ASKED ME OUT!!!!!!!!!! I was shook. The only issue was I was still dating Joey. Me and my friend decided I would say yes to Tomas and would break up with joey. So I said yes to Tomas. But when it came to breaking up with joey I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. So for about two months I dated both of them until I finally made up my mind. I choose………………………..