Terror is not knowing where you are
all of a sudden
you’re awake
And it’s pitch black!
Even though your eyes are open……
And worse, you can’t seem to move. Maybe because you’re strapped to a chair, with duct tape. You feel it! You can definitely feel your calves are strapped to the front legs of the chair. And your hands are strapped behind the chair, it also sealed your mouth shut so you can’t scream. It’s hard to breathe through your nose when your nose starts running. Suddenly, you feel claustrophobic and very paranoid. You’re hyperventilating! Your chest is pounding, palpitating! THUMP! THUMP! THUMP! It’s so quiet, your heart beats reverberating throughout your body like spasm. Yet, you can’t seem to move. And frustration’s mounting. Anxiety. Panic attack….. your chest is heaving ….. taking in deep air ….
You begin sweating even though it’s cold. It doesn’t help that the chair is made out of metal, you feel its cold hardness! It’s getting very cold in here. Or is it you’re just, terrified! Because you’ve got goose bumps all over your body…..
Calm down!
You start to reason with yourself. Assessing your situation. Like what the fuck’s going on? Why am I here? Why can’t I move?What the fuck! No! No! No! I’m losing it…… my fucking mind! Why can’t I move?
Shhhh!
Calm down ……
Okay. You’re back to yourself. You’re in control, now. A deep breath through the runny rose. Ah, fuck it! Can’t breathe, that’s why. Can’t fucking calm down because of it. So you blow hard through your nose and let it drip down your chin…..
Now that’s better!
You’re calm now. At least enough to think it through, by tactile assistance from your skin. Yes, you’re naked! You knew that as soon as you woke, but the reader didn’t…..
Now that you’re breathing better, and feeling better, you’re now able to comprehend your immobility better.
You can’t move because, besides the tape, you’re also ‘glued’ to the chair!
No wonder…..
No.
No, no.
It’s something else. It feels like you’re part of the chair ……
Instinctively guided by self preservation, you try to move the chair by jerking back and forth ….. but ……
…… you can’t move at all, not even your neck ….. back of your head is stuck ….. to the wall? ….
….. and now you’re not even sure if it’s a chair at all …..because your arms and legs lost circulation ….
….maybe it’s part of the floor …. oh yeah? ….
….. you’re on a floor, right? …… feels solid …
……. what the fuck! …..
……you’re sliding down the rabbit hole again …….. you’re losing it ….. real quick ….. you can feel your heart pounding! ….. goddamit! ….
…you’re starting to panic again …… what the fuck! …..why! ….why! …why!
….. why! why! why! ……
AND THEN SUDDENLY IN THE DARKNESS ……A SQUEAK ……. AND LIGHT!
Far down the long corridor, it seems. There’s a faint light, perhaps 200 feet away. It’s luminous shape is a rectangle, or a door. Now closing with a squeak. Back to darkness. Pitch black. So other worldly utterly black. ….. except!
FOOTSTEPS!
He’s coming!
He’s coming straight at you!
You can hear his footsteps!
And his walking very fast!
After all, one thing that wasn’t molested are your ears. You can hear everything, especially it’s been so quiet in here for awhile. In this terrifying darkness where imagination runs wild on the edge of hysteria. Your eyes are wide open, bulging with complete terror! And you can’t say anything …. the damn tape! You can’t even scream for help …… at least say something to this …. crazy … mother ….fuc ….
OH NO!
Now all of a sudden the memories come flooding back from the night before ……
OH NO!
IT CAN’T BE HIM …… !!!
“Hello my friend. How was your sleep. I take it you’ve had a goodnight’s rest. It’s at least I can do for a good friend such as yourself. Making sure you’ve rested well. And how are you my friend? Although I haven’t seen you since high school, I still admire you. I think you’re still cute. You’re a fine man indeed. I know, I know. You think I’m crazy, don’t you? Okay then, yes I am! I am crazy for you, my love! Why I can’t believe my luck last night, when I saw you in the gay bar! ….YOU? The macho football player? The one who used to beat me up, and calling me a queer and a faggit! Remember that night? The night you and your friends beat me up after you guys had beers. That was the same night that……….. I hung myself!
And now you’re out of the closet, is it? Oh you saw me, and liked what you seen. You like a tranny, don’t you? And then I told you who I was. And you couldn’t believe it was me. And how you apologized to me, awww, so sweet of you. Only because you wanted to fuck my big silicone behind. You were so fucking drunk, you forgot I was dead! After what happened? It was the talk of the town! Right there and then that’s when I decided to kidnap you! You showed me you don’t really care what happened to me, because you forgot the most crucial thing, my suicide! Well now, I’m going to show you something, so you can remember things better…… are you ready? Because your eyes are going to hurt for a minute because you’ve been in the dark for so long…… so long ……”
AND WHEN THE LIGHTS HITS YOUR EYES ….. IT HURTS SO BAD !!!!!!
YOU BLACK OUT …….
Terror is not knowing where you are
all of a sudden
you’re awake
And it’s pitch black!
Undefined
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Wow! You did a really good job of capturing an emotion, give life to it in a way that nightmares scare people. You also handled second person perspective really well, I tend to have troubles with it myself. I think my favorite part of the whole story was when you called attention to the story itself, “You knew that as soon as you woke, but the reader didn’t…..” it’s a very direct way to pull a reader out of the story while also keeping them engaged. When reading a story with a second person perspective the audience has a tendance to put themselves into the main character’s shoes on a deeper level than could be achieved in first or third person, so by reminding the reader that they aren’t actually a part of the story is a great trick. I really loved it and thought it was really well done!!
Thank you very much, Mick. Everything you’ve said is on point! Yes, I wanted the reader to be engaged with suspense….. What the hell’s going on? Make them feel uneasy like the victim, and at the same time remind them that they’re safe and comfortably at home enjoying the story. That’s why I wrote, “You knew that as soon as you woke, but the reader didn’t…..” Again, thank you very very much!
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Btw, the picture in the post gave me the inspiration for the story. Maybe it’s irrelevant here, because everyone writes, but I also draw. So if you see any of my post with pictures…… they are my own personal drawings.
Thank you very much, Mick. Everything you’ve said is on point! Yes, I wanted the reader to be engaged with suspense….. What the hell’s going on? Make them feel uneasy like the victim, and at the same time remind them that they’re safe and comfortably at home enjoying the story. That’s why I wrote, “You knew that as soon as you woke, but the reader didn’t…..” Again, thank you very very much!