I wish you were here instead of this rather regrettable hard seltzer. I don’t know how many ways I can tell you that you are the one. I am trying to learn and I try to apply what I learn to the next attempt but it seems like all the rules change again. Lines in the sand. So easy to draw, so hard to cross, so impossible to erase. If we don’t want to fight, then why are we always fighting? There is so much we don’t know about each other. We have learned how to live without each other so then why are we here again? Did you “wake me up just to call me sleeping beauty”? I don’t want to be anywhere else. You are all I ever wanted. I don’t understand what is confusing about that or confusing about I love you, you’re the love of my life, I want to kiss you, I miss you. These things are not hard to understand. You’ve never wished that I would say these things on a lonely night staring at the ceiling? But I say them, and you just turn away. Maybe I am too weak or too scared or too shallow to be what you want, but you have a lot of nerve to say that you aren’t what I want. The queen of double standards… call me out and cut me to pieces, but I can’t call you out? You will be mad one way or the other so what does it matter? You can hide behind your justified anger and your righteousness all day long. You want me in your world, but you are quick to prove to me how insignificant I am there. I love you anyway. It hurts because it is both true and incomplete. I know, baby, I know. I love you. I love you when you are salty and mean. I love you when you are sultry and fun. I love you when you are distant and dismissive. I love you when you are vulnerable and sad. You break my heart, I have been crying for hours, but I love you anyway. We cannot be who we say we are and leave this love on the table. We cannot feel what we say we feel and leave this love on the table. Help me. Work with me. Save me, and I will save you. We are both hard. We are both spoiled. We are both responsible for the failure of this relationship to be what we both know it can be. And we are both necessary to turn it around. If you are out then ok, but if you are in then let’s be in it together.