Summer. 1988
“I never fucked anybody over in my life who didn’t have it coming to them”.
Tony Montana speaks his wisdom through the small television, where Klaus borrowed a copy of Scarface from his father’s bedroom. The tape was so fucked up you can hardly see anyone’s face on the screen because it was too damn blurry. Klaus didn’t care. His mother would, she would have said “You can’t see a thing Klaus!”.
Klaus laid there in his bedroom with the movie on thinking about his mother again. Every night she would tell him to turn it down because he always had the volume up too high at night when his parents had to go to bed early for work. She knew about his obsession with movies. Some days, she would come home from work and walk to his room to watch the vile and grotesque movies with him. One night, he remembers her coming home late and surprising him with a copy of the Terminator, his favorite film. Those two had a special bond together and were always close.
If Klaus wanted to, he could ask her anything. One morning before school, he asked her if premarital sex was safe since all the teachers from Sex Ed taught that it led to STDs. Someone even claimed that you’ll die by sticking it in without protection. Another said that premarital sex would lead to a future divorce. “You stick it in then BOOM you have a baby Poppin’ out. Then you and your ‘significant other’ will begin arguin’ over who wipes the baby’s ass and who has to work and who has to stay home. Someone be cheatin’ on someone. Daddies walkin’ out on their kin. Mommies are gettin’ laid to make a livin’. Don’t get married young and don’t have sex kiddos,” says Coach. What the hell?
“They get paid to tell you that Klaus. I lost my virginity when I was seventeen. Just wear a condom. Besides, you’re eighteen. Why do they still bother with the Sex Ed bullshit? And If you ever need to ask me about anything in regard to that stuff come to me don’t ask your father. Our first time together he didn’t know squat about sex” his mom said. Mom I didn’t need to know that.
Some may say he was a mother’s boy, but to him she was his best friend. Klaus of course had a couple friends, but when he needed someone to talk to, she was always there…. but now he is alone. No one, not even his father or his friends could replace the bond that he had with his mother. He remembers hugging her goodbye every time she left for work feeling the soft, red sweater along his palm. Her head always rested against his chest because he was tall like his father. Her curly blond hair was always up in a bun before work. He remembers how soft it was against his cheek when she would hug him goodbye. The last time he said goodbye she was late to work. She had no makeup on and her hair was half-assed because she woke up ten minutes prior to her leaving for work. To Hell with the guy who ran her over, Klaus thought as he sat up to stop the tape.
She would’ve liked Scarface.
#
The sun began to sink behind the mountains outside of his bedroom window. The streetlights turned on and the kids playing outside began to walk back home. Klaus looked outside his window and could see the whole view of the neighborhood. Deines High School can be seen if you look closely near the tip of the last house on the left. Just to the right of the high school, a glimpse of the Deines Steakhouse sign can be seen where his mother worked as a waitress. His stomach turns every time he sees the sign. He missed his mother and would risk anything to see her again. The clock began ticking towards six thirty P.M. His father will be home soon from work.
Sweat began to drip down from his forehead to the tip of his chin. On a summer night, the heat will still find you. Klaus walked to the bathroom and turned on the dim light to wash his face. Slowly, he lifts his head up to look at his reflection in the mirror. His wavy black hair touches the tip of his nose. He looks deep into those brown eyes…his thoughts thinking deeper than the tears dropping down from his chin into the sink. Why did you do it. Why couldn’t you have stopped to check on her or call for help. Why did you drive off? Why mom…why did you always like to walk to work? The cops are still looking for him…he should be dead…not behind bars…dead…. i will find him…. you killed my mom…. you…you…you…”Son of a bitch!”. The thoughts began speaking out loud.
His head began to throb. A pulse near his temple began to show. His right eye began to feel pain. Klaus felt like puking. His lips were numb, and his throat began to tingle. Anxiety began to crawl through his skin, his body shaking. Not again. More tears began to fall. He doesn’t cry when he’s sad. No…not Klaus. He only sheds a tear when he is upset, lost, frustrated, anxious… angered at the fact that the police still have not found the suspect who ran over his mother. Mom…what am I going to do without you. He sat on the toilet with the seat down. His left leg began to tremble nonstop. Goosebumps ran across his leg, and the hairs of his arms stood up. Killer. The lights began flickering. Water. He slowly stood up and turned the nozzle on for the shower. He stepped in with his clothes still on. The water was soaking up his clothes, but there was no time to take them off. Klaus felt like he was going to pass out. His eyes were pink with red spots on his cheek. Vomit ran down his pants, the moisture from the water was starting to get thick. I want to die, I want to see you sooner. The light bulbs blew out. Darkness. Klaus began to fall to his knees. His back is now against the wall. He stood there for five minutes until he finally collapsed on the floor of the shower. He laid there in the bath tub; his eyes closed and his body trembling. His hair is covering his eyes; the water is getting thicker. He can feel it crawling in his mouth. Red water is beginning to hit his face. Klaus doesn’t notice.
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