"selfish"
by Masarati
Kiss me like there is no tomorrow
Make me feel like I am the only women in your life
I promise if you break my heart I will grab a knife
Mentally, I am not ok but with you everything
seems so right
every time I am with you I realized I need you
without you, my life is not worthy
Sometimes I believe you are good for me other times
I feel that being with you is dangerous
Imagine being in love with someone who accepts you
and one day they wake up and decide to leave you
just thinking about it gives me pain
I hope you can love me forever
I picture my life waking up next to you every day
When I am not with you it is not the same
When I am not with you I do not feel the same
I feel all alone
Do you question loving me?
I know there are times where I overthink
Sometimes I have a hard time letting everything sink.
My fear of losing you is equivalent to
someone who has a fear of water because they can not swim
I am afraid to drown
The last thing I want is to look like a clown
Every time your lips press mine I feel sparks
I vision an audience applauding
applauding our love for one another
From the moment I met you I knew you were the one
I knew I wanted to spend every moment with you
I am emotionally attached and I know sometimes it is too much
and sometimes I fuss
I want undivided attention
Poetry
3 Comments on “selfish”
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You have good material to work with here. It reflects the broken heart that you have suffered quite well. It also shows how connected you are with your feelings. Very nice. Here are two suggestions I have for you that would help this piece immensely.
1) By providing too many details, you take out the mystery that keeps your reader attached. For instance, in your line that begins with “Mentality,” the movement of the piece is slowed down by this one word. Remove it and see what you think.
2) I strongly recommend that you work with someone to help you understand the rules of grammar in the English language. When there is misspelling or syntax errors, it provides problems for your reader.
All in all, I think if you want to put some work into it, you would have a very nice poem.
Thank you for the advice I appreciate every word advice
No one is perfect. But the feelings of broken heart are very clear in this poem. But someone is there to love a loving person. Those who do not love need love too !! Love is a deceiving term but I would love myself first !! Because whole world seems selfish if we cannot love only one person that is within me.