I know I have been different lately and I’m about to tell you why
Anything I do you consider is stupid or dumb you go to insult and make me cry
I look to you for support and you shun me away
I go in shutdown mode and my actions are not the best which cause the way I behave
I have never been in a relationship like the one I have with you
It’s driving me crazy as I want to share my feelings with you and yet I don’t know what to do
I know I make mistakes because they are frequently brought to my attention
We really don’t speak of any flaws you have or anything you do wrong is never mentioned
You say I have changed and you don’t like this new change you see in me
Now you can understand a little of what I feel when I look at the change in you where you are so smug and mean
It’s not normal for someone to go off the edge on such small things as you do
Then it causes me to react in ways that are not like me where even to myself I am sad and blue
Did you ever ask yourself why you needed the drink so badly, why you couldn’t do without?
Did you feel that if you didn’t have a shot or the bottle was it like fighting a demon you couldn’t get out?
Well when I met you I never drank much, so I drank with you to be equal to be your partner!
I didn’t want to you to reject me if I didn’t drink or smoke with you as I want you as my knight in shining armor
So the drinking made me loopy and perhaps a little crazy, it didn’t make you prince Charming!
I’m not the only one who makes mistakes and does stupid things while under the influence that can turn quite alarming
I own up to my stupid mistakes, I want to kiss and make up and not get yesterday back but only make tomorrow better
Work on our relationship and marriage and learn to talk to one another so there is not goodbye letter
I love you and have put you above all who are in my life
I made that decision the day you asked me to be your wife
I chose you out of all the fish in the sea; I saw something in you that no one could see
I fell in love with an half broken man who had issues with the bottle, so what…I accepted you, I desired you, I wanted you and I still do.
For you to reject me, not want to touch me, kiss me or show me any kind of security makes me go stir crazy
I don’t want us to fall into a pit we can’t get out of and in love become lazy
I love you so much and at times I really don’t think you see it
And each time you get mad with me you are ready to split
I will end with this, if you were to decide you want to leave me there’s nothing I can say or do
But I will tell you I gave it my all and will continue to love you.