(Abuse mention and sex mention)
If you couldn’t tell by the title this is a Maria Lewis × James Reynolds story! College au! Enjoy!
” I gave you everything and it still wasn’t enough.” Maria said to James.
“It was never.. enough..” Maria cried.
“You made me feel like I was nothing.” Maria sat next to James on the couch without looking at him.
“Made me believe that I was difficult to love.” Maria held onto her sweat pants until her knuckles became white.
“And like a fool I kept trying, I kept trying till it became too much.” Maria touched to bruise on her arm.
“I got in so deep that I lost who I was.” Maria cried.
“I knew it was toxic. I knew it wasn’t right.” Maria looked at James.
“But no matter how bad things got, I couldn’t help but try.” Maria smiled slightly.
“I told myself it would be different this time.” Maria wiped her tears.
“I just couldn’t give up.” Maria frowned.
“Constantly battling over whether this is love or lust?” Maria looked at their room that they share.
“‘Cause if it’s love.. then why was it so messed up?” Maria looked at James again.
“I would treat myself like nothing. Yet to you.. I gave so much.” Maria laughed.
“And then you go and break my heart.” Maria put her hands on her face.
“Tell me that you’re sorry and that this is a fresh start.” Maria looked down.
“And like a fool, I’d wait. Wait for the day you’d make another mistake.” Maria looked up and smiled with tears in her eyes.
“A part of me wants to speak up, But I hesitate.” Maria sat up on the couch.
“It’s like you’re controlling me, you’ve infected my brain.” Maria turned to face James.
“How do I escape when you’ve become part of my dna?” Maria lightly touched James’ arm.
“Even when you’re gone. I’m still the one left with all the pain.” Maria cried again.
..Later that day..
Maria was at the park with Alex and John.
“He said, he’s sorry. He told me he didn’t mean it and that he’s going to change.” Maria said to Alex and John.
“And I choose to believe him when he says he won’t hurt me again.” Maria smiled while looking at the grass.
“I’m not expecting you to understand. Go ahead, judge me.” Maria looked up.
“But if I lose him, I’ll have nobody. Do you get that?” Maria looked at the couple with sadness.
“Who wants to live a life where they’re alone and empty?” Maria questioned.
“I need him just as much as he needs me.” Maria laughed with tears glazing her eyes.
“In some sick twist of fate. He completes me. That’s why it works.” Maria stood up.
“We just keep going, till one of us inevitably gets hurt.” Maria stood in front of the couple.
“So yeah, I choose to stay.” Maria let her shoulders slump.
“Go ahead and call me weak.” Maria crossed her arms.
“I’m not expecting you to understand, just know that leaving someone, is not that easy.” Maria sat back on the bench and looked at the couple.
“He’s gotten into my mind and without him I’m paralyzed.” Maria held her head with tears streaming down her face.
“To the point where I force myself to believe him every time he apologizes.” Maria laughed.
“Even though I know it’s all lies.” Maria glanced at the couple.
“Every waking moment I cry, I’ve gotten used to it.” Maria sat back on the bench and sighed.
“It doesn’t hurt so much anymore. I’ve become numb to it, I’ve become sore.” Maria looked at the tree her and James met under.
“And in some sick twisted way, he’s my only cure.” Maria smiled with a river of tears.
“What can I say? I’m incredibly flawed.” Maria sat up again to face the couple.
“Love isn’t like what you see on tv. This is what it’s like, this is my reality.” Maria placed her hands on her chest.
“It’s not as magical as they portray it in a Disney movie.” Maria waved her hands in the air.
“It’s a lot of pain, and sacrifice. You just keep pushing, until you bleed.” Maria laughed.
Maria saw James standing at the tree with white roses in his hands.
She ran towards him, hugged him, and kissed him. They walked back to their dorm hand in hand.
She waved goodbye at Alex and John. She then left with James.