It’s raining,
my heart’s draining.
A sore spot to come.
my unyielding love is afraid of you.
Lessoning
time remaining,
I want you forever.
my unyielding love can’t live without you.
my broken pieces,
you healed it all.
I’m so glad I fell,
I hope we don’t fall.
my unyielding love is nothing apart from you.
Poetry
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The structure of the poem allows the reader to search the page for the next line giving the illusion of time passing. Great job! An intense love poem– can’t go wrong with the genre!
Suggestions:
-If we’re mentioning a decrease in value, then “Lessoning” has a tiny typo. Remove the “o” and replace with an “e”.
-Check out where and why you used the capitalization and punctuation that you did.
Take care!
Michelle R.