randyjohnson

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"Real Bears Aren’t Like Winnie the Pooh"

by randyjohnson

I learned the hard way that real bears aren't like Winnie the Pooh. I decided t...

0 Likes | 1 comment | 20 views | Poetry | January 7, 2019

"Why People Shouldn’t Call Police Stations"

by randyjohnson

I called the police station but there were no cops. Every single police offic...

0 Likes | 1 comment | 33 views | Poetry | January 2, 2019

"Welcome 2019"

by randyjohnson

I welcome 2019, I'm glad it's here. I hope it will be an excellent year. Many...

0 Likes | 3 comments | 28 views | Poetry | January 1, 2019

"The Ending of 2018"

by randyjohnson

The end of 2018 is very near. In just a matter of hours, 2019 will become the...

0 Likes | 1 comment | 24 views | Poetry | December 31, 2018

"The Death of Chad Sheets"

by randyjohnson

When I learned about his death, it was hard to believe. An actor died twenty years ago...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 35 views | Poetry | December 24, 2018

"Permanently on Santa’s Naughty List"

by randyjohnson

Something happened and my son is pissed. He found out that he's on Sant...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 18 views | Poetry | December 15, 2018

"Merry Christmas, Mom – Part VI"

by randyjohnson

The Christmas of 2012 was the last Christmas that you celebrated on Earth. You we...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 8 views | Poetry | December 1, 2018

"Black Friday At The Hospital"

by randyjohnson

I have a sad story that requires music that's played by a fiddle. I've been wou...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 12 views | Poetry | November 23, 2018

"What People Should Be Thankful For"

by randyjohnson

People should be thankful for their families. We should be thankful not t...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 11 views | Poetry | November 22, 2018

"The Late Stan Lee"

by randyjohnson

He created The Incredible Hulk and The Amazing Spider-Man. Stan Lee has died and...

0 Likes | 1 comment | 11 views | Poetry | November 15, 2018

"Veterans of the USA"

by randyjohnson

This is a special day because it's Veterans Day. We celebrate because certai...

0 Likes | 1 comment | 9 views | Poetry | November 12, 2018

"Red"

by randyjohnson

This morning, I experienced some good luck. I bought a Chihuahua for one hundr...

0 Likes | 1 comment | 14 views | Poetry | November 11, 2018

"I Voted Against Phil Bredesen Again"

by randyjohnson

On November the 6th, I voted against Phil Bredesen. Yesterday, I was pleased to learn t...

0 Likes | 2 comments | 7 views | Poetry | November 8, 2018

"PRAISE THE LORD!"

by randyjohnson

Our world has been consumed by violence and greed. but instead of needing wealth, God is all that I need. When people find religion, there is no greater reward. I have three important words to say, "Praise The Lord!" When we suffer, God fee...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 12 views | Poetry | October 20, 2018

"A Woman’s Stupid Behavior"

by randyjohnson

I want to share a story with you that I learned yesterday. It's about a woman's stupid behavior. A man had to leave a restaurant because a black employee was going to call the Police because the man referred to her as 'Black'. She was going...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 12 views | Essays | October 6, 2018

"Disney’s Unacceptable Behavior"

by randyjohnson

I have written two poems about Disney's unacceptable behavior towards certain fans and now I'm writing this article. Disney's behavior is not only unacceptable. It's also unprofessional. For many years, Disney was one of the most beloved mo...

0 Likes | 1 comment | 8 views | Essays | October 1, 2018

"Disney May Have Bitten Off More Than They Can Chew"

by randyjohnson

Disney may have bitten off more than they can chew. They call certain fans nasty names, that's a bad thing to do. Because they call certain fans nasty names, fans may not watch their movies anymore. Disney has crossed the line and they're c...

0 Likes | 1 comment | 8 views | Poetry | October 1, 2018

"Judgement Day Is Coming"

by randyjohnson

Judgement Day is coming, God will eventually have all that he can take. People...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 11 views | Poetry | September 30, 2018

"I Won’t Watch Anymore Disney Movies"

by randyjohnson

I won't watch anymore Disney movies because I don't like how Disney treats their fans. They call us racist and sexist and I've had all that I can stand. They call certain fans racist and sexist because we disliked The Last Jedi. When it com...

1 Like | 1 comment | 12 views | Poetry | September 30, 2018

"Rhue"

by randyjohnson

She starred in a Star Trek episode as the girlfriend of Khan. She was talented but it's...

1 Like | 0 comment | 10 views | Poetry | September 30, 2018

"Ice Cold"

by randyjohnson

I have a story that needs to be told. I knew a woman who was ice cold. Many men liked her because she was beautiful and had big boobs. But you could've poured boiling water down her throat and she would've pissed ice cubes. A family was ki...

1 Like | 1 comment | 9 views | Poetry | September 28, 2018

"1978"

by randyjohnson

I want to go to a time when things were great. I wish that I could travel back...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 11 views | Poetry | September 28, 2018

"Twister"

by randyjohnson

A powerful twister tore a man's life apart. It took his wife and kids and le...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 13 views | Poetry | September 27, 2018

"Goodbye Kmart"

by randyjohnson

The Kmart has closed that was located in Morristown, Tennessee. That's one less place w...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 11 views | Poetry | September 26, 2018

"Terrible Moonshine"

by randyjohnson

People don't like me because I make terrible moonshine. Nobody in their right...

1 Like | 1 comment | 13 views | Poetry | September 14, 2018

"I’d Rather Watch Paint Dry"

by randyjohnson

There is something that I hate, and it's something I won't deny. I hate the new Doctor Who TV show, I'd rather watch paint dry. I even complained to the BBC, and told them that I hate their show. If you're wondering if I'll ever watch it ag...

1 Like | 1 comment | 12 views | Poetry | September 11, 2018

"Burt"

by randyjohnson

Because of a man's death, millions have been hurt. He was a fantastic actor, and...

1 Like | 1 comment | 9 views | Poetry | September 7, 2018

"That’s The Good Thing About Possum Innards"

by randyjohnson

That's the good thing about possum innards, just as good the second day. But when...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 19 views | Humor | September 1, 2018

"Arthenia"

by randyjohnson

Arthenia was my aunt and she was as kind as she could be. She was a lovin...

0 Likes | 1 comment | 7 views | Poetry | August 4, 2018

"Happy Birthday, Mom – Part VI"

by randyjohnson

Many people know how important you were to me. If you hadn't died, today you woul...

1 Like | 0 comment | 13 views | Poetry | August 2, 2018

"Pantsed"

by randyjohnson

My ex-girlfriend dumped me even though I have cancer. My sister knocked her out in a mall and then she pantsed her. She had to walk around the mall in her underwear. People pointed and laughed, I wish I had been there. You may want to dump...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 9 views | Poetry | July 19, 2018

"GE Appliances"

by randyjohnson

There's something about my wife that astounds me. She won't use any appliance un...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 8 views | Poetry | July 14, 2018

"Dad Ceased To Be Alive"

by randyjohnson

Half a decade ago today, Dad ceased to be alive. Five years ago, Dad died...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 5 views | Poetry | July 13, 2018

"A Different Version of Hide and Seek"

by randyjohnson

My nephew is making me play a different version of hide and seek. This version involves a gun, if he finds me, things will become bleak. In this version, if a player is found, he is killed. I'm scared out of my wits, I'm sure not thrilled....

1 Like | 2 comments | 12 views | Poetry | July 9, 2018

"I Wrote The Declaration of Independence"

by randyjohnson

I got tired of being called a hillbilly from the sticks. So I built a time machine...

2 Likes | 2 comments | 11 views | Poetry | July 4, 2018

"Repentance"

by randyjohnson

When a man murdered three innocent people, he got life without parole. After he was locked up, something was missing from his life, he wasn't whole. If you're wondering what was missing, I'll give you a hint. He turned to a higher power bec...

1 Like | 1 comment | 14 views | Poetry | July 4, 2018

"Opened Star Wars Action Figures"

by randyjohnson

I had all of the original Star Wars action figures that were sealed in their pac...

0 Likes | 0 comment | 9 views | Poetry | July 3, 2018

"Stick My Job Where The Sun Doesn’t Shine"

by randyjohnson

What was the point of going to college and furthering my education? I've been here for twenty years and have gotten nothing during the duration. I sell appliances in this crummy store. I quit, I won't work at this place anymore. I have two...

1 Like | 2 comments | 13 views | Poetry | July 1, 2018

"Two Purrfect Sweethearts"

by randyjohnson

I have two purrfect sweethearts and I'm smitten. They are yellow and they're my...

1 Like | 2 comments | 12 views | Poetry | June 29, 2018

"Cheating Electrician"

by randyjohnson

I cheated when I went to the electrician school. I don't know what I'm doing, I am truly a fool. I always screw up every house that I wire. When the power is turned on, people scream "Fire!" I connect 110 volt wires to 220 outlets and 220...

1 Like | 1 comment | 12 views | Poetry | June 28, 2018