What to Expect When She’s Expecting: A New Dad’s Survival Guide
Your significant other is pregnant and due at any moment. You’ve planned for this, you’ve got this. Your bags are packed and you’re ready to leap into action at a moment’s notice! It’s time! You (calmly) make your way to your car (don’t forget mama!) and off you go. After some check-in procedures, you’re with your loved one in a nice, hospital delivery room. Awesome! Now what?
I am husband to a great wife and the father of three wonderful children. I was there for each of their deliveries and was always right in the thick of things. If you’re reading this, you may not know what to do or expect as you stay with mom at the hospital. Here are a few valuable tips I’ve learned throughout our journey.
1. Be Her Biggest Support System
This one seems obvious, but, sadly, it’s not for every dad. The most important thing you can due prior to going to the hospital is fixing in your mind that you are going to be there for mom and cater to her every need. If you don’t always know what to do or say, that’s OK.. Trust me, you’ll have those moments. Just be there to hold her hand and offer words of encouragement when she needs it.
2. Bring a Cellphone Charger!
Again, this is an obvious one, right? Sometimes we overlook things like this. You’ll not only want a full phone battery to read or watch movies when you’re not helping mom, you’ll also want to have that camera at the ready when the big moment arrives!
3. Delivery is NOT for the Squeamish!
Let’s be real about one thing. If you stay in the delivery room, you’re going to see and hear things you’ve probably never experienced before. It is VERY important that you know yourself and your limits in this situation. I had a nurse eye me with suspicion and tell me quite frankly that if I passed out at any point, they would simply kick my unconscious body aside. Just be sensible and know what you can handle. The last thing these medical professionals need is to try to work around dad sprawled on the floor!
4. Contacting Family
This one is tricky and can consume a LOT of time and attention. This is mom’s big day and the focus needs to stay on her throughout labor and delivery. It’s acceptable to not update family every few minutes with EVERY new development. Send a group text instead of calling everyone individually. You’ll have plenty of time for that later and any family member who has been through it will certainly understand.
5. You WILL be Uncomfortable!
Hospitals do a fantastic job of providing mom with all of the comfort and support they can. They do their best with dads as well, but honestly, it’s not an experience at The Four Seasons. If you choose to stay overnight with mom (I highly recommend this if it is possible), you will be uncomfortable on the room’s pull-out and you will be awakened OFTEN by nurses and doctors. Just try to remember that as unpleasant as this is, mom’s discomfort is much more important.
Well, dad, the rest is up to you! There are going to be times you get emotional and you won’t know what to say or do. The hardest thing I have EVER had to do is to watch my wife look at me with tears of pain in her eyes as I stood by helplessly. You WILL be tested, and you WILL find out what kind of man you are. Just remember to breathe, stay focused on mom, and, of course, celebrate the birth of your little one!
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