No. no you don’t get to choose and pick. You don’t get to choose if you lose or not. You never get to pick if you get hurt. You can’t just look at a list of names and pick who hurts you or who you love. That shit doesn’t work like that. You can’t fucking force yourself to love or even like something you don’t love or like. No you don’t get to pick. It just happens. You know what you can do? You can fucking try. You can try to win or try to lose. You can choose who you want in your life and whether or not they hurt you is just not a choice. You can choose to fucking try. Saying you’re trying and actually trying, well those are two different things. You can choose when you’re ready to give up, but don’t think it’s a bad thing to give up on smoothing, especially if that something is really fucking toxic for you and the people around you. if you need to, let it go. Your still here you’re still breathing and your beautiful.
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I freaking wish we could pick and choose who we love and who loves us, who we hurt and who hurts us. I hope nothing bad happened with the guy from your previous post, and if it did, you’ll be okay. Everything is survivable until the last thing.