Captivating,
That is what I think when I look at the deep dark eyes, the manipulating ways of your soul, the type of power that you had placed upon my conscious.The medicine you fed me was more like a anesthesia than a fix numbing my mind and soul from what was real. I would wonder if you really were true to your words of affirmation, or the true meaning of what your intentions were. You made yourself known and you still do, the dreams of mine you haunt and the memories that are played over and over among my existence. Your existence use to be a joy, but now it is more of a haunting for me. I valued your ways of friendship that i thought would never cross the line.I found myself hypnotized by your words, the way your eyes would stare into my soul, blinded by the true intent of your existence, the pain you were going to inflict on me. The sacrifice of my soul and reputation was forever going to be destroyed. The person you were trying to create in me was starting to take over what i was, and has demolished that soul. Brainwashing me, captivating me into the palm of your hands. Making sure I never sought the love that I longed for from the love of my life, because you were determined to get what you wanted.
I found myself drowning in the attention, the ways to get out because I knew that I didn’t want to inflict anymore harm to anyone of their emotions. The grip you had on me that wouldn’t let go. I knew you were not going to make this easy. Trying to captivating my soul, washing what was within me away. I wake up to find the person I was, not there. I wake up to see you feeding off of others soul, feeding off vulnerability of others. My heart, my head is locked on a friend not a monster, what i should think of you as the devil, you are in disguise of. My soul can’t hate you, my soul cant avoid you, or to not let your existence haunt me and mentally haze over my mind of such memories and you. You drowned me in the ideas that were wrong and the ways I could trust you. I came out of the water pale, my soul gone and you standing there with my heart, the everything that I have known in your hands. I can never get that back, the person I always tried to be. I am filled with poison you fed me and I dont know how i am going to detox.
I watched you almost become lifeless, just to turn around and take the life out of me. to bear me upon your manipulative ways. I should have never stumbled onto your path an felt the responsibility of saving your soul, feeding your existence and letting you captivate my existence of my heart, soul, and mind
General
Comments are closed.
Likes
1243 Views
Share:
This was heartbreaking, and very moving.