Lets start from the very beginning.
what is Depression I’m going to try to tell you guys what it is in my own words. but of course using my own experience with it and info I came across about it.
Depression is a serious medical illness that effects how you feel in a very negative way. you’re thinking and how you act can change everything!! so I know when you hear illness you’re like what I’m not sick but you are. Do you ever feel as if people think that Depression is just a joke and not that serious and you can just get over it. Now don’t get me wrong I wish this was a joke and that you could push it to the side and it will never come back. But come on lets get real you can’t just get over something that is known as a mental illness.
You may not have it so you don’t truly understand what people go through are hey! maybe you do understand it and wish you could help others. And maybe you do have it and you wish you could get some help. My job for my Blog is to share with you all a better understanding about what depression is and how it effects people. I will also share how it makes me feel. Although it has a name I believe we all deal with depression in different ways no matter if we have the same symptoms . Its just my own way of looking at it.
I do have depression I know it and my Doctor has told me I have it. But my problem is wondering why I have it. I mean I have been through some stuff but I’m still trying to understand how to control my feelings. without having to take pills are talking to someone . I know everyone tells me I should talk to someone about how I feel. but I feel like I don’t need to because I’m trying to deal with my depression on my own. because hey I don’t want people thinking I’m crazy because of how I feel and act from time to time. So maybe I should talk to someone?
You guys ready for this I came across a lot of signs and symptoms of Depression. I’m going to share them all and then talk about them and the ones that I have been dealing with.
symptoms
Trouble sleeping
Loss of Interest in favorite Activities
Increase in Energy
Change in Appetite
Touchiness
An Emerging Dark side
Trouble sleeping you can say I have a lot of that seeing how tired I am I seem to stay up all night. I’m not going to say I lost Interest in my favorite Activities because I mean one of them happens to be writing. I’m going to say other things got in the way of wanting to write and so fourth . My Energy level is at a Zero not going to lie are sugarcoat that shit because I do feel like as the days go by the lazier I feel. Change in my Appetite guys my Appetite has been all over the Fucking place I mean come on now what are you doing to me?. Somedays I don’t eat at all and other days I eat so let me shut up and just say I eat when I feel like it there you go the honest truth. Touchiness meaning when someone brings up some shit you don’t want to talk about. when someone in my life are people around me bring up things that I feel the need to not want to talk about yeah I guess I do get upset. Emerging Dark side darkness is all around me. signs
Feeling of sadness
Irritability
Frustration
Focusing on small matters
feeling of worthlessness
Feeling of Guilt
Fixating on past failures
Trouble thinking
Trouble remembering things
Crying for no Reason
feeling of sadness I feel sad all the time even in happy moments its like why do you feel sad when the person next to you is laughing their ass off. Its like you want to laugh to but inside you just want to cry. Irritability and Frustration you better believe when something dose not go as planed I do get upset fast and start to stress out so very bad that I’m pretty sure I have some gray hairs. focusing on small matters I’m a very shy person but I pay attention to Everything so like if we are talking about something I will pay attention to that matter even after you have gone and its like 2 weeks later I’m still on that shit. Feeling of worthlessness I always feel worthless because I’m the type that dose not like to let people down. so if one day something amazing happened and then out of nowhere it gets taken from you. you’re going to feel worthless. because you gave it you’re all and you feel as if shit will never be the same after that. And Guilt comes in to play. people can make you feel guilty all the time so you feel as if something bad will happen if you don’t follow through with the words and opinions of others. past Failures I do look back at everything I have done in life not really paying any mind to what’s going on with me now. I guess you can say I kind of compare my failure with what’s going now so in other words I’m thinking the same stuff that happened to me will happen again.
Trouble thinking OMG!! yes I have a bad time thinking because my mind is everywhere. Trouble Remembering things I’m noticing that I do have a hard time remembering things because of how much I think. I find myself taking a moment to remember something that has happened last week are even yesterday. Crying for no reason I cry but its always for a reason because I mean if you think to much you’re going to cry and that’s what happens with me.
Are you guys ready to move on from all that sadness and wondering. should we take the next step into finding ways to Murder our Depression. Because God knows we don’t want that shit in our life’s anymore. there are bigger brighter things around us that we need to pay more attention to. so let me help you and let me help myself as well to better understand that we are not alone and the darkness can be removed.
Lets do this I have a list of things that can help people with Depression let me share them with you and then we can talk about what I do that keeps me up and going.Practice mindfulness
Listen to upbeat Music
Stop the Negative self talk
Distract yourself
Use more light
Write in a Journal
connect with friends
get enough sleep
forgive others
Exercise
Don’t give up Never Give up
up there are some cool and nice ways to come back in to the light because that’s what we want right. Somethings I do to feel better I write my feelings out do I do it on paper no I don’t really. I like to share what I’m going through on my Facebook Page so on social media. some people might think are even call me crazy but in all honesty that’s what makes me feel better. When I’m feeling like shit and the world is crashing down on me I want to share how I feel. even if it bugs people are makes people feel a type of way that they really should not feel. I have had so many people tell me I don’t need to be saying what I’m saying on Facebook are whatever.
is it a call for help is it for attention Hell no! its not I do it because I feel like people will better understand why I’m like this. I do it because people hear me out more then if I’m just talking to them in person. I do it to get the shit that’s inside my head out because I don’t want to think about it anymore. I feel like when I share people can help by telling me not to feel that way. it is my business and it is my life thats me Tiana chooses to share with you all because I don’t want to go through life feeling like I’m alone when I no dam well I’m not. so what I post is not to start Drama I don’t want anyone to feel sorry for me. I just want to share what I’m feeling. and all I look for is answers in other people who don’t have Depression. Don’t get me wrong we all have some problems that sometimes need to stay to ourselves but I’m not going to seat here and act like I don’t have problems. I want to share like I said to get the answers I’m looking for.
moving on..
I have a son who is 3years old he makes me happy every time I look at him but you know what’s sad is that I always feel like I’m doing something wrong and that I’m not the best mom. why must I talk about this. because I think I should to let people know that happiness comes from you within even if you feel as if you are doing something wrong you have to let go of that negative feelings and move on to better bright feelings.
now when you become a parent you’re job is to take care of you’re child to teach you’re child right from wrong. you’re going to get everyone’s opinion on how you’re doing things with you’re child if its no their way its wrong but is it really because no one is a copy cater meaning know one brings their kids up the same. every person and every family is different you’re getting opinions on every little thing you do in you’re life. so why let what people say make you think are feel like you’re a bad mom when in you’re head you’re telling yourself that you are doing you’re best and why don’t people understand that.
the honest truth to me is that people will say they understand and brake you down at the same time. People with Depression take in things differently we are already having a hard time controlling are feelings and then we get someone who wants to tell you what to do. Now I can name some things that I have notice about being a mom to my son I know all the things that I should be doing with him more but I’m letting how I feel get in the way of spending one on one time with my son.
I’m always in the room and I don’t watch my son I know that and I can tell others do to but what they don’t know and we all should look at it this way. we where not put on this Earth to follow in someone else’s foot steps so if we want to be happy then we can be happy. My problem is I feel like I have to do what someone says because I don’t like letting people down. So I know I play with my son and I know I keep him happy and he keeps me going so what I’m trying to say is don’t mind what others say are think of you. because you have to pay attention to what makes you happy not what makes someone else happy now its easy for me to say this but can I do it?.
moving on…
what where we talking about oh yeah how to overcome Depression see I let my thoughts and feelings get the best of me up there. I let out how I feel about random things and I should not have to feel that way. overcoming something may not happen over night but if you take one step at a time it will happen. so lets take the next step in to my Blog
Hey guys I’m here to talk about Support and Comfort its something that everyone not just people with Depression want. Everyone even baby’s from the day that a parson is born they seek comfort from others around them. Sometimes its easy to get that support and comfort form others but sometimes it can be hard trying to find it.
Now I know we all don’t want to sound like big cry baby’s because we are looking for some type of support. But having someone that cares enough to help you when you are down is a very good blessing and we all should be thankful for all the people who take time out of Their life’s to make us feel better.
Lets Talk about Comfort what is it? A state of physical ease and freedom from pain or constraint. So (for Example) if someone you cared about so much just up and left you. you’re going to feel sad right and all you want is someone to tell you that you’re going to be ok weather its someone giving you advice using positive words are just a long needed hug that’s Comfort.
Support is when you need someone’s help you need their shoulder to cry on are OH GOSH!! lets not look at it in a Negative way what is wrong with me. Ok Sorry about that so say you got maybe a new car but everyone seems to be pointing out all the negative things about that car and why did you have to get it. So you tell them come on guys all I want is a little Support I want someone who can support my decision on getting this car. I want to hear nothing but that’s Awesome are Good Luck are let me give you my opinion about this car. But in the end we all know that its the car you wanted and should not let people make it seem like you where wrong for buying it with you’re own money at that.
so remember guys if you’re going to show support and comfort make sure its coming from you’re heart make that parson feel better don’t make them feel even more bad about what’s going on by pointing out what they could of are should of did DO NOT BLAME THEM for feeling the way that they feel. sometimes telling someone to get over it its like a stab to the back. So try to understand that parson and be as positive with them as you can we all look normal from the outside but on the inside people are hurting. The Words you speak may not seem heartful to you but make sure to think about what you’re going to say to them before saying it.
Because words do hurt with me if I go to talk to someone I make sure that what I want to say to them is not in a rude way because yes I care a lot about other peoples feelings so I watch what I say. And if I say something that sounds rude to someone else’s its not me being rude its just how I feel about what ever we may be talking about. So always remember if someone says something to you and OMG it sounds rude are mean its because that’s what they think its their opinion and we should not be mad.
my goal is to move on from rude remarks because its just words yeah it may hurt but should not let it go on by fighting with someone about what they say just letting go and ignoring someone if you think they said something rude its ok at least you got to hear how they feel. So my thing is Just be nice when you come to a parson who is having a hard time.If you’re not sure if someone is needing help then lets look at some signs that will let you know that someone around you may need that Support and Comfort and that they are just not saying anything about it.
Excessive worrying or Anxiety
Severe mood swings
Sad mood
isolating themselves from others
So make sure to pay mind to what people say to you because they just might be asking for help and kindness can make someone’s day so much better.
so I wanted to add on here that I hope you all enjoy my thoughts on Depression I’m not going to stop writing about it but I will be talking about other thinks that pop up in my head.
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