Today, like every other day
I will slowly wake up
in excruciating pain, but I have to pee, so I eventually push through.
I am up now, I let my dog out, but I immediately rush back
to my dark, miserable room.
I’m in so much discomfort, I forgot I had to pee, the feeling went away.
I forgot my dog
I forgot to brush my hair, 3 weeks
I forgot my to brush my teeth, 4 days
I forgot to change clothes, 2 weeks
I forgot to tell my father and mother hello, 5 days
I forgot to eat, ….
This morbid pain is not like any other,
it runs it’s fingers through its victim’s hair,
it promises that you are being taken care of,
it makes you forget the things that aren’t “important”
I made this friend back when I was seven.
My friend sleeps with me nightly to make sure I wake up with her by my side
My friend has left scars on my heart so deep, they bleed with the slightest graze
I have left light pink scars all over my body, my friend told me it would help
I was hospitalized twice, my friend told me that if I swallowed enough pills, the pain would finally stop
My dearest friend, depression, please leave.
You have consumed my entire life-
you ate me like I was a cupcake made of shit- spit me back into this world
like a fireball aimed at gasoline, just to watch me crumble in pain.
Your acid fingertips on my heart are what keeps me going.
Please leave.
My dog is still outside
I still haven’t peed.
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Wow, this is very heavy. I really like the use of repetition in regards to things you have forgotten to do. It really puts into perspective how depression can destroy a person physically and mentally. They just stop caring, and it’s not that they don’t want to care, it’s that they find it difficult to find the motivation to care that they have showered or brushed their teeth. The stanza starting with “My dearest friend” empathizes a strong sense of desperation that they did not ask for this to happen and they want more than anything to get better. Great job!
Thank you so much! It was a hard piece for me to compose, just because how much everything is true, it’s hard to write down things that really affect you. Depression is definitely a contender in the majority of people’s lives. I am happy I have writing as an escape and I’m even happier you enjoyed it!